tabulas.com

My boyfriend now knows about my other blog. He read it. I showed it to him. Told him I had one. Most entries were about G. Haha. But there were entries which I didn't show him. Anyway, there was this one. Torn. That was before. When I was still texting G. Code names: blue and green. My boyf thought it was him and another guy from ateneo. Haha. But blue's G. Anyway. There was this other thing. I said I didn't want guys drinking and stuff. I even typed "the friggin guy's drunk". So I told him the truth. That yea, it was him.

Anyway, that thing's done. We're both fine. Yea.

I shouldn't have given the site to him. Cause I can't write other stuff there anymore. Haha.

I've realized that I do get hurt when G has a new girl.

Oops. But it's the truth. What's that? Sigh.

The truth is rarely pure and never simple. 

Yea. It's never simple.. I can't even understand myself sometimes. What the hell is wrong with me? I "like" pushing people away. Oh wait. I don't. I just do it but I don't like doing it. Cause I thought that they'd be better off alone without me. Wah. Shut up. Haha. I'm being.. Difficult. I'm being unfair. This is wrong. Wrong wrong wrong. Feelings all mixed up. Even family problems.

Nobody needs to know this. Wait. Wrong. HE doesn't need to know this. Sigh.

Stress. Pressured. I need to get out. Stop time. Leave the country. Clear my head. I need peace. 

G's online. And he's not even noticing me. Guess that's how it ends. Lost another person. I can't talk to him, or text, or whatever. Cause obviously, there's a new girl. The person shall be his priority.

 Anyway. It will seem bad if I do. I have my own. But we're friends, right? Pft. What a cliche.

Ayun. Signed out. Sigh. ..